You know who's a good guy? Paul Newman. The next time some freepertrash sez that Hollywood liberals are good-for-nothing parasites, calmly remind them that Paul Newman has, to date, given $125 million to charity via his "Newman's Own" line of foods. Then ask the freepoid to name a conservative who has donated one-tenth that much to any cause outside of fishing around in Bill Clinton's pants.
Here's a good deed that's good for you...
Download a free book and teach yourself an easy-to-learn, flexible, object-oriented programming language. No, I'm not joking. You'll be supporting the Open Book Project and learning something at the same time. Good for ya. Builds character.
If I was serious about this whole blogging thing, I'd want to be more like this guy. He neatly eviscerates The Creature from the Blog Lagoon and also does a number on Ron Rosenbaum, a Chris Hitchens apologist at the New York Observer. Highly recommended, if a recommendation from a low rent slacker like me means anything... Hell, I'm not sure I even know how to spell recommendation. Two "m"s, right?
What are government's greatest endeavors, and how successful has it been at these endeavors? Good question.
Since part of the site in question is an online poll, one may assume it has been thoroughly freeped by now. Go give them some intelligent responses.
Dear Ann Slanders:
What the heck is wrong with Democrats? They always cheat like in Florida and now in New Jersey. Can't they win an election fair and square?
Fed Up Conservative in Kansas
Dear, um, FUCiK:
Democrats cannot win an election, which is exactly why Bill Clinton had to be impeached. You see, if God had wanted liberals to run America, he would have given them issues on which to campaign. Unfortunately for Democrats, everybody knows that Saddam Hussein is worse than Hitler, Stalin and Hillary Clinton combined, and there is no issue other than deciding when to pound the living snot out of Iraq.
So liberals have to resort to cheating and legal tricks to give the voters a choice. This is because they just don't share our passion for defending states' rights which, as delineated in the constitution, are inviolate and immutable, unless our guy is in danger of losing an election.
To paraphrase Barry Goldwater, extremism in the pursuit of conservatism is no vice. In point of fact, it's a lifestyle. And it can be a very lucrative lifestyle if you have a minimum of talent and even fewer scruples. I hope this helps, and thanks for reading!
While walking to work I heard some kids practicing an obscene version of the Pledge of Allegiance without God or the unborn in it! I think in fact they dared to make fun of God as well as take His Name in vain! Will Attorney General Ashcroft be implementing any federal Faith-Based school programs to correct this unpatriotic behavior?
Militant in Michigan
Dear Mim:
Welcome back to our pages. In answer to your question, General Ashcroft is implementiing a broad range of Faith-Based initiatives to correct such erratic behavior in children. First up is "Honor thy father and mother day" where misbehaving children can be legally beaten with rods and staffs. Recalcitrant youngsters who do not submit to a sound beating will be stoned to death by an angry mob. Refreshments served afterwards.
Next will be Patriotic Correctness Day. School children will stand before their classmates and recite the Pledge of Allegiance, the Star Spangled Banner and the Second Amendment. Any child who cannot or will not recite these sacred words without error will then sit in a circle of their classmates and admit their failings and imperfections while the other children hurl abuse at them. This process is guaranteed to create patriots and quell dissent.
Finally, we'll have "Rat Your Parents Out Day," where happy children will win prizes and candy for reporting the anti-American sentiments and liberal leanings of their parents. All the kids will get cake and ice cream as they watch their leftist scum parents disappear into the hands of General Ashcroft's Secret Anti-Terror Police.
I hope this helps, and thanks for reading!
Why hasn't President Bush invoked the Taft-Hartley act to force the striking Longshoremen back to work in the West coast ports?
Down with unions in Cali.
Dear DwuiC:
For starters, the dirty, traitorous, liberal union-thug longshoremen are not on strike. They were locked out of their over-paying, undeserved jobs by the the Pacific Maritime Association. PMA says that the longshoremen were staging a work slowdown, for which they were locked out of their jobs.
That being the case, it's questionable if Taft-Hartley could be invoked here, because that act is generally used to force striking union-thugs back to work.
Even if he could use Taft-Hawley here, President Bush won't. Why? Because he knows it's wrong to interfere with the workings of the free market. As you know, regulation of business is fascism** and the government has no grounds to meddle in the West coast ports. Yes, it's costing the economy $1,000,000,000 a day, but that's the price we pay for a vital, free market.
I hope this helps, and thanks for reading!
(** I actually heard Las Vegas radio talkshow host Tru Hawkins say this on am720 KDWN. He also repeatedly claimed the longshoremen were on strike. I think he and Rush Limbaugh use the same fact checker.)
I saw a sign this weekend that irritated me. It was a closeup of a teenage girl's face. The text said "It's easier to be a virgin than it is to be a parent." No arguing with that, but what irritated me was the fact that it could just as easily have said "it's easier to use birth control than it is to be a parent." But it did not say that. Why? Because the agenda here is not keeping kids from becoming parents. The agenda is abstinence.
Ah, sweet abstinence.
As Marxists have their vision of the worker's paradise, so anti-sex prudes have their utopian dream of teenagers not having sex. It's ludicrous, because abstinence is basically a campaign of "just say no to sex." And we know how well "just say no" worked to rid the country of drugs.
Telling teenagers not to have sex is like telling clouds not to rain. That's what they do. That's what they are. Young mammals in heat will not be diverted for long from the biological imperative, messages about morals and values notwithstanding. The practical thing to do is teach kids the truth about sex and make sure they understand the importance of birth control. But the moralists and the blue-noses don't care about what's practical. They stick their fingers in their ears and shout "virginity equals virtue" until all other voices are drowned out of the debate.
Remember that the next time some dittocritter sez that only conservatives are realistic and logical.
